Stargirl: Season 3

Early thoughts of the season:

I predict this season is going to be a return to form for the series. I enjoyed season 1, and was mostly annoyed by season 2. This specific premise and that specific teaser says this is probably going to be this show finding its groove.

The season is going to be utterly predictable. Make no mistake: I think that's a good thing. It's a kiddie superhero show. It shouldn't traffic in shocking deaths and tragedy. It's not Breaking Bad. The Flash could learn from this. The Gambler is the least important person in the episode (despite the episode being about him) so I knew he was the one getting murdiddlyurdlered. Whodunnit? Here is where the season being predictable comes in handy. The killer is almost certainly one of the heroes, which will drive up the tension between the good guys and the former baddies if they are being blamed for something they didn't do. Who is the culprit?

I could be wrong, but I am 90% certain it's Sylvester. Because of the heroes present, he is the least important, i.e. he's had a major role on the show for the least amount of time. So if the show is gonna embrace the predictability, it's him.

Will there be mitigating factors? The fact that the character has already described losing time in this very episode suggests that may very well be the case.

But I knew from the teaser Gambler was getting murdered, and I loved watching the episode unfold exactly the way it should have. There's something comforting about that. But as someone who has seen more TV than average people, you want to take my advice for the likeliest culprit? It will be Sylvester. 90% certain of it.

Dark horse is the daughter Becky. But that only happens if the show sucks. I don't think it does.

That was great. *****.

There were a lot of interesting individual elements that I will discuss in the second half of the review. But I kind of need to talk about what made me unhappy first.

Last week I said I enjoy a predictable story being told the way it should be told. I scoff at people who decry predictability and demand shocks that make little sense instead. I argue a story going down the way it should is better than a story going down the way you didn't expect, even if it's worse for it. By far.

My problem with this episode might prove groundless. I'm operating under the (fair) assumption that Sylvester is the murderer. I say this not just because his behavior is erratic. But the killer being a hero and the villains being unjustly blamed for it fits into the theme of the series exploring redemption and the heroes having to question their negative assumptions about their former foes. If I am wrong, and Sylvester didn't do it, my entire complaint for the first half of this review doesn't matter. But as far as predictable stories being told the way they should be told go, the mystery is being told wrong here. Because for genre vets like me, Sylvester IS the first suspect, and probably the only real one worth looking at. And a mystery should know that about its audience. It needed to raise the question itself in this episode. Sylvester could have offered an amazing alibi that looks iron-clad right now, but we'd realize after it's revealed it was him that it was bogus. A villain needed to ask him where HE was that night. And the fact that none of them did is a failing. By not putting Sylvester on the board as a possible suspect at all, it almost seems like if and when the series does the reveal, they'll expect the viewer to be shocked by it and feel betrayed by it. That's telling the story wrong, if not by the characters, than by the viewer. That's this show assuming we're dumber than we are, and will actually be surprised by the most obvious suspect. Sylvester is the best suspect because he fits the theme of the season. You want to argue that that doesn't actually matter in a true mystery, I'll ask you the last time a hacky Berlanti show didn't tie the moral or resolution to an unrelated personal problem of the heroes, and you'll realize them doing that here would only be about a tenth as bad as the crap The Flash and Supergirl asked us to swallow on a weekly basis.

But if the show DOES want to tie the mystery resolution to the theme of the show, it has to be a fair mystery. Otherwise the predictable story is being told wrong. And there is no more wrong way to tell a predictable story than by believing the audience will not be able to predict it. That's storytelling 101, don't you think?

Let's talk about random things in the episode.

I thought it was cool that it was revealed after Mike and his friend left the bathroom that the sign DID say "Boys" after all. Talk about hitting the correct theme.

The Shade saying Pat was the only one at Sylvester's funeral says a lot.

Either both Sylvester and Shade are misinformed about Jay Garrick's death, or this episode is suggesting that last year wasn't an actual canon Arrowverse crossover, and John Wesley Shipp played a different version on this Earth. That would be SUCH a disappointment to me, but the truth is I think Jay's journey to being The Man In The Iron Mask on The Flash was not previously written in stone, so if the Shade sent him elsewhere while he and Starman believed he killed him, that would work. On the other hand, Superman & Lois is saying the Berlanti shows are moving past the integrity of The Arrowverse, which I think is a mistake. As many shows as there are, I didn't find the continuity all too confusing, until Superman & Lois outright said it was a different Earth. I could perfectly rationalize that show for every episode before they decided that. As it stands, it's hard to figure, and this stuff is confusing the issue.

Paula is only asking what difference it makes in making the German Chocolate cake and buying one from the store because she is rational and right. The idea that Barb needs to teach her a lesson about caring about something is ridiculous. It's a freaking cake.

I have reservations. I don't like Sylvester being hidden in the shadows as a surprise betrayal and twist. Because if it IS him, he actually isn't. ***1/2.

First of all, that was a great episode. Here is where my thoughts currently stand:

Sylvester is not dead. Wrong time for it. I also no longer believe he's the killer. His unfiltered talk with the staff about the crime scene says he's innocent, or at least lying to the staff about it. It's likelier he's innocent. The culprit is probably the planty guy at the end who it looks like might have killed him.

And let me be honest,. I hope I'm wrong. I hope it is Sylvester. Last week I complained about the show not setting up ANY false alibies for Sylvester to falsely rule him out from the audience as a suspect, but the show did MUCH better than that this week. It made me care enough about the character to wish it ISN'T him. Which is a trick, because when Cindy declares the guy an ass, she's not actually wrong. He's just an attempted murderer playing at hero and utterly disrespectful of Pat in the process. But listening to Pat's impassioned speech to the guy, I WANT him to be innocent, and eventually change for Courtney's sake. Now, if it IS him, I'll be properly pained instead of just saying "Aha! I knew it!" But that's only if it him. And I think it's the mystery plant creature, which is the wrong solution for ANY given mystery (outside of Scooby Doo). But while Sylvester is the RIGHT culprit for the show to make the killer, he's also somebody I give a crap about. And I DO hate him. But I care about him too. Neat trick.

I thought the Crocks were great in this episode, especially Paula's struggles with Barb in her not fitting in. And frankly while it's clear part of the reason Cindy is casting a wide net for potential villain suspects is because she has the Gambler's computer, and she knows how hot it is, I also believe her when she said the reason she went to Sylvester was because she wanted to impress him. And yeah, Sylvester is pretty much a jerk there for rejecting her instead.

The one part of the episode I don't like is the Cameron stuff. It is unlike every other element this season. Because unlike every other element, I don't see how it ends any other way but badly. In my fondest heart I hope the frenemies and Sylvester and the town can learn to live with each other as one big happy family. Cameron is the one nasty loose end totally outside of that. Were I Courtney, I'd be avoiding him on general principle. Her cozying up to him while knowing her brother killed his father is just going to make things a thousand times worse in the long run.

I loved the episode though. ****1/2.

If it's not Sylvester, Cindy turning into the Dragon King is a good alternative culprit. Messy. Good.

Cameron's stuff is messy in a way I DON'T like. Whatever Courtney thinks she's doing, her having to be so dishonest with him about everything is going to backfire. Especially since his grandparents know her secret. If they didn't, I wouldn't be as concerned.

This episode is a solid reminder that Yolando's mom absolutely sucks. Every time I find Beth's parents too insufferable I look at what poor Yolanda is stuck with and find their smothering refreshing in comparison. Do you know what pisses me off the most about Yolanda's parents? There has been no growth there. In three seasons her parents are exactly as horrible to Yolanda as they were when we first met them in season one. In a season subtitled "Frenemies", and one where Sylvester and Crusher are tossing beers back and forth and watching The Outlaw Josey Wales together, her mother being in the same nasty rut as always grates especially for that reason.

I liked it, although I do have a few concerns about the future. Cindy being the killer sounds all right. But they could screw it up. And Cameron's stuff is iffy too. ***1/2.

What is this show doing? What is wrong with it?

What's wrong with it is it's television, and television is terrible. That's all this show's (and most show's) problems boil down to.

We know Court and Cameron are going to end badly. Even the characters seem to know it. So why do it? Why put Courtney in that specific painful scenario with nothing but a bad outcome possible? Is this Geoff Johns' way of keeping his sister's memory chaste? Because man, this is NOT working. It won't work. And every time a TV show does something like this I complain my head off, and fans of that show inevitably tell me to slow my roll and trust the producers. And I'm always right anyways, while the fans seem dumbfounded after the plot has fully shaken out that that the show has actually been destroyed by it. I'll tell you the silver lining about that. The show has been shaky enough for the past two and a half seasons that for once, I don't think anyone reading my review will protest my dislike of that. Sometimes when I push up against bad television, I seem to be knocking down what many people consider icons. I don't think I really have to worry about offending anyone who reads this review. The viewers and fans of this show are very well aware of its virtues AND faults. I'm not torching any sacred cows for once.

And why was Rick SO rude to Cameron at the table? I understand why he doesn't like or trust him. But Cameron doesn't. Is Rick so dumb he doesn't realize his uncalled for rudeness is actually suspicious? And if he truly believes Cameron is a threat is that the vibe he was wants to send to this potential threat with his behavior? What is this show doing?

I don't like seeing Joel McHale lose his cool. His cool is Joel McHale's entire selling point. Maybe you could argue the show is trying to let him stretch for once, but that's not an acting muscle I believe he needed to have pulled, or one I felt rewarded for him flexing. What is this show doing?

Why was Thunderbolt in the JSA to begin with? The bit with the "nicer" bullies was truly funny, but it puts into sharp focus that he's a hindrance. Mr. Mxyzptlk was also similarly mischievous, and his intentions were similarly harmless. But Superman never asked him to join the Justice League either. Jeez.

The one thing in the episode I liked was kind of painful. I like that Beth has good parents. When she tells them what she needs from them, they actually listen to her, as hurt as they are. Compare that to the outright monsters Yolanda has to come home to every night.

But man, what is this show doing? Why does it insist on being television? **.

Ultimately, I'm giving the episode a mediocre two stars, solely for Sylvester's amazing scene with Courtney at the end. But the scene being amazing is a double-edged sword. He is now the prime suspect of being the murderer again in my mind.

There were two things in the episode that totally sucked and wrecked it for me. The first sucky thing was Yolanda in the confessional. I am aware Berlanti shows are crappy at lawyer stuff and police stuff. But do they have to be absolutely crappy at every single profession they choose to portray? All they need for a credible priest is for him to say wise-sounding platitudes. Instead he's this hot mess personally inserting himself into Yolanda's decisions. Perhaps one could argue this is the show's shot at organized religion and it's portraying the priest poorly as a reflection of that message. But that's not actually readily evident to me. I sincerely think it's just likelier the show's writers are so crappy they can't do the SUPER easy job of making a priest sound comforting and wise and staying in his lane.

For the record when Yolanda tells Beth she wouldn't involve her parents in this nonsense she was right to point out the notable difference that her parents actually sucked. Food for thought.

The second thing that ruined the episode for me, was Cindy begging Yolanda to let her explain herself and Yolanda says, "It's too late for that." You know, Yolanda, you don't exactly have the high ground for refusing to hear her out as long as you broke into her house and cast the first blow. This is something that would be evident to any sane person, but this show is badly written, and the producers hope you aren't smart enough to actually know that true thing. The fact that Cindy isn't like "She broke into my house TWICE, and attacked me unprovoked in my own bedroom," shows the writers are sincerely that clueless. This is not a put-on. It doesn't occur to them the specific reason Yolanda doing that is over the line.

As long as Yolanda is doing that, NONE of the team have any business judging Courtney's choices. And I think Courtney's choices regarding Cameron SUCK. But I am not going to for one second pretend those kids have the high ground against her after attacking Cindy in her own damn house unprovoked. Not even a second.

I woulda given that a single star but Sylvester went up and done amazed me. Damn him. Bonus damning points because he's probably the murderer. **.

What the hell, man?

I loved that because it raised questions. Good ones. And I love not knowing the answers yet.

Yolanda's confrontation with her mother was a long time coming. I find Mom a far more despicable character than anyone in the ISA. When she talks about "What Yolanda did" she's actually blaming her own daughter for being a victim of revenge porn. It's actually quite sick. If I were in social services I would take Yolanda away to foster care to not have to put up with that level of cruel emotional abuse. I'm not kidding about that. That "What you did" moment was absolutely sick on every level.

I'm worried about Rick, but him punching out the camera was a good act break.

I know the Shade loves complaining about helping the heroes, but I think his problem is that deep down he enjoys it. Not because he's righteous and likes doing good for goodness' sake. But because it's fun. That is pretty much the biggest drawback to being a supervillain in the DC Universe. Superheroes get to punch out talking gorillas. As a rule, supervillains don't. I'd want to be a superhero in that Universe for this reason.

Zeke has turned from annoying to amazing. When did that happen and how did I miss it?

For the record, Keith David should have gotten a "Special Guest Star" credit. If you ask me, he's a bigger name than Seth Green.

Man, I was about as confused by the premise as an average episode of Twin Peaks. Trust me, that's high praise. ****1/2.

What an empowering message and story about free will and choice. I love that both Bones and Helix turn out to be reasonable, and it's revealed nobody is held against their will. And yeah, Courtney's idea turns out to be right. And I love that the staff was willing to try it.

I also love that Pat says that Shade helped kill the JSA, and he vehemently denies it, and Pat points out that he was still an accessory. And that's true. And the argument that moves the Shade is that redemption is more than choosing not to do bad. It's choosing to do good.

It was very interesting learning about Pat's horrible father and it was very instructive to understanding Pat's psyche when he claimed to love him anyways. I believe him because I have an abusive person in my life that I also very much love. I've repaired that relationship but I'm guessing part of Pat's regret is that he was unable to. I sympathized and understood his love for that reason.

Man, that was great. *****.

It looks like the Ultra-Humanite is the killer and the season's Big Bad. I don't like that it's someone we hadn't met. That's not the proper way to structure a mystery, which is how this season billed itself as.

I think there were individual good elements in the episode, and I found the ending with Cameron's grandfather exhorting him to choose love refreshingly and unexpectedly positive. But I'm calling the episode a failure anyways. And I think really, it's an unacceptable failing.

Regardless of how it turned out, regardless of the mistakes Rick made, Courtney never should have decided to tell Cameron the truth at his spooky mansion where his possibly criminal grandparents are always lurking in the shadows. She should have chosen to take him to a place they both felt comfortable and where they wouldn't be disturbed. And this specific failing makes me give the episode a failing grade because as far as mistakes go, it's not a remotely forgivable one. Why did Courtney make that bad choice? Because a ton of the bad conflict in the climax would not have happened if she hadn't. She deliberately made a bad, stupid decision, to make it easier for the writers to write conflict.

That is bad. That is a failing. If you ask me, I personally believe it is one of the worst writing failings somebody could ever do. A ton of genre fans find that sort of thing acceptable, which is why I've never felt comfortable in those specific fandoms. You guys excuse far too much. You and I both deserve better than stuff like this. We all do. And the first step is to stop pretending it's remotely acceptable. It's not. Your TV is failing you. Don't give it that permission by tacitly approving of something this badly written. It's not fair to you, and frankly, the writers (in this case Geoff Johns) should be ashamed of themselves.

I mentioned there were some good individual elements. I thought Luke Wilson brought his A-Game as Pat talked about his concerns with Mike with Barbara. And him bonding with Crusher was great, as was Barb telling Paula they were friends, and Paula appreciating it because no-one has ever said that to her before. There is a lot of good pathos going on with the background characters in this episode. It does not change the fact that the episode wrote the story poorly, simply because poor writing made the drama easier for them to come up with. That's false drama. That's bad drama. That's unacceptable on any level. **.

That was a VERY strong week, but as I was watching it, I felt there was a flaw to the arc that was bugging me. It didn't ruin things for me, but it bugged me. But what's great is the ending means that specific thing I worried about might actually work out okay.

First off, I love that Crusher calls Pat and his family "their people". And the show has done the legwork to make the audience care about the Crocks and invest in their reform. Their deaths are tragic, and weirdly beautiful for that reason. What I think is fascinating about the Crocks, (and you can tell me if this is wrong), is that they are far more invested in their reformation than the good guys are. Forget Sylvester, while Barb has grown close to Paula, the truth is Crusher makes Pat a little uncomfortable. He accepts the idea that Crusher says he wants to live a normal crime-free life, but his reactions to Crusher's enthusiastic buddy-buddying suggests part of him thinks it's a con. And the part that doesn't is uncomfortable anyways. What I loved about the Crocks is either that prejudice on behalf of Pat and the Whitmores never registered, or it never bothered them, or made them think less of them. And I love and will miss the Crocks because they were far more open and genuine with their feelings than many of the heroes.

Look at Cameron. Courtney couldn't even tell him the truth about who supposedly killed Icicle. And Cameron suggests maybe his dad was not the best guy, but he was his dad, and Courtney took him away from him. And regardless of the phony drama the show loves cooking up between the characters, that element is basic, raw, and totally relatable.

The thing that bugged me was remedied by Icicle Sr. being alive, the potential killer of the Gambler, and possibly the Bigger Bad than the Ultra-Humanite. My concern in the episode was the elder McKents leaning towards learning to forgive Courtney and her family for what happened. And I was like "Are they seriously positioning these people for a redemption arc with the heroes? Am I the ONLY one who remembers and is bugged by the fact that the grandmother murdered Cameron's beloved art teacher for no reason JUST last week?" And Icicle being back suggests complicated family matters are ahead, and that doesn't seem like a thing the show is going to ignore after all. After all this, it would be dramatic malpractice to do so.

I think it's important for us to see Jakeem and Mike relating to and talking to Thunderbolt. It's makes Thunderbolt's trickery a lot more forgivable to understand a little bit more about his laid-back personality. What his friendship with the boys says is that as much of a hindrance as he is, it's not due to actual malice on his end. Which helps a lot for me.

For the record, I think it's wonderful that it's Sylvester who suggests the McKents are probably being set up. Great character growth for him there.

So yeah, as strong week. In another world, I would complain about the show killing off the Crocks, because they are an asset to the show, and now the show doesn't have them anymore. But knowing this is going to wind up the last season makes that specific complaint irrelevant. If the show had lasted seven seasons I would have approved of that beautiful death in the final one. I would have been otherwise miffed if it weren't for the fact that the show HAS been canceled. It feels appropriate now, as much as it saddens me.

So, yeah, that was a damn good week. ****1/2.

But even if Jordan was telling the truth about wanting to make peace, he killed the Crocks. And regardless of what he says now, it wasn't self-defense. He should not just be forgiven for that. That is not a moment he should be given a Mulligan over. I don't agree with Sylvester's notion that he should go over there and take him out. That's not a heroic perspective. But they also sure as hell shouldn't team up with him for any reason after killing Crusher and Paula.

I was screaming at my TV at the cruelty of Courtney and her friends leaving Artemis to suffer in that empty house, and then Barbara is there saying she shouldn't be alone and to come back with her. All of the people in the episode talk up what a great example of goodness Courtney is. The fact that it's Barbara making the most important gesture of not just the episode, but arguably the season, which says Courtney has yet to live up to the innate goodness of her mother.

Thunderbolt can't kill people? Can he bring them back to life? Because I would be wishing for a resurrection of the Crocks first thing if he could.

2 episodes left. I hope the series ends well. ****.

I'll buy Sylvester as the murderer. That was always my first guess. Sylvester as the Ultra-Humanite? That doesn't play. That doesn't work. That isn't fair to either the audience or the characters. They "cleverly" used some flashbacks to show Sylvester's Master Plan, but it really doesn't matter. It doesn't work and it isn't the show playing fair with the audience.

I'm sure you are all like "Matt, you are overreacting again." And I'll tell you the scene that told me I'm not. It was Zeke suggesting to Pat that Sylvester said those horrible things to protect the group. It's like the writers couldn't even keep Sylvester's motivations straight in the same damn episode. That specific thing more than anything else says they are toying with us, and screwing us around. I am not Geoff Johns' pet monkey, by the way. It's insulting he's treating me like I am.

Good riddance, Stargirl. I've had enough. 0.