Secret Invasion (Disney +) (2023)

One of the things I disliked most about both Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D., but ESPECIALLY the Netflix stuff, is they'd take the most far-out Marvel concepts and "streamline" them, making them utterly ordinary and boring instead. And Marvel Studios has started to do that too. It started alarmingly with Ms. Marvel, and the liberties they took with her creative powers for budgetary reasons. But while part of me really loves and digs the idea that there are good and evil Skrulls, and that they aren't all conquerors, it feels like the premise is not superhero enough anymore.

I love that there was a mutiny with Gravik, and the decent Skrulls had had enough. But there was something to the notion from the comics and cartoons that the Skrulls were simply evil conquerors. I thought the take of refugee, friendly Skrulls in Captain Marvel was great. But I think this show trying to have it both ways weakens both concepts. I could have lived with good Skrulls populating the MCU. Or entirely evil Skrulls. Misguided Skrull bad guys? Takes a LOT of fun out of things.

I think Sonya is very funny, and has a delightfully warped sense of humor in deadly situations, so this classy British woman seems like a total badass. My problem is that I don't think she should be teaming up with Fury. A lot of her behavior is purely evil and unforgivable. In her own way she is as violent and dangerous as Kravik, and I don't like the fact that this episode means she will never be held to account for that, and treated like a Punisher-style antihero instead. I'm not happy about that. And yes, I find the character funny and charming. She is also despicable, and not somebody who should ever be redeemed.

I like that when G'iah said something horribly and personally rude to Priscilla, Priscilla called her on it. I think G'iah was under the mistaken impression that because her father wanted her cooperation so badly he was willing to tolerate her abuse, that that went for every single other Skrull on Fury's side. I like that she forgot she was dealing with people outside of her family drama, and that Priscilla gave her the proper level of shade deserved for her disrespect.

The eyepatch is back. Are we supposed to cheer? Because while I do struggle to understand why it's come back at all (it literally adds nothing to Fury's arsenal but a badass fashion statement) I struggle even more trying to understand why the show stopped using it in the first place. It was the defining thing about Nick Fury in both the MCU AND the comics, and if people are wondering why fans are resisting the low-key Fury Samuel L. Jackson is being asked to play for this show, that's Exhibit A.

By the way, Fury's bum eye isn't actually disfigured or disgusting. Why did he need an eyepatch to begin with then?

The Marvel Cinematic Universe was a truly remarkable thing for a few sustained years. Occasional bad movies and all, the overall quality and consistency was quite an achievement. I believe its best days are behind it at this point, but I again want to point out that shows as dull as this, and movies as dull as Quantumania cannot erase that specific achievement. I feel like critics and fans are gunning for the MCU because they smell blood in the water, and there is nothing quite like bashing a successful project, especially one as successful as the MCU. My opinion is the franchise's current failures do nothing to take away from those successes. And I think if people are claiming otherwise they need to check themselves. It's actually remarkable the franchise remained as good as it was, for as long as it did. In any other beloved franchise dreck like this show would have been common fifteen years ago. Quality cannot be sustained in huge genre franchises for long periods of time, when their are so many different cooks stirring the pot. Kevin Feige kept all the ingredients together until Endgame, and it's a shame it feel apart soon after. But I found that fact inevitable, and something that does not take away what an achievement those first Three Phases of movies were.

Where were we? Let me sum up the episode in one word: "Eh." 2 1/2 stars.

Also, it turns out Ritson is a monster. Fury called him a one-term President, in a direct shot against the bow at Trump, but I don't see his hateful, awful words that way. I'm betting his Presidency has the same trajectory as George W. Bush's. They were channeling the wrong awful President when Fury said that. Wartime Presidents who talk ill-conceived crap get reelected. That's just how it works.

Russia on the Ukrainian border? The episode is already dated a year ago, and because of the writers strike, they couldn't exactly fix it.

The reveal that the "dying" Fury was actually G'iah was both good and bad. First of all, I'm glad Fury isn't either dying or gaining superpowers. But despite Kravick pointing out she didn't recognize him, (which was the first clue she wasn't Fury), I think she, as Fury, said a LOT of things that she would have no way of knowing. You can say, "Fury gave her a script," but a LOT of it felt kind of personal, and not something Fury would trust to another person, especially one he didn't trust like G'iah. Honestly, I loved Kravick's rant about his regret of killing the guy with the family, and that being why he took his face. And I would have liked Fury to have been the one to hear it, because on some level, I think he needed to.

The end montage of vigilantes accidentally killing humans and Skrull "friendlies" (and getting their dumbs asses killed by competent Skrulls) shows the Idiocracy has finally hit the MCU too.

Sonya and G'iah coming to a "mutual using of each other" understanding isn't exactly what I'd call a happy ending.

As far as I'm concerned, the stuff with the Kree at the end wanting to make ANY kind of peace pushes Agents Of S.H.I.E.L.D. even further out of MCU canon than I already believed it was.

The end with Fury kissing "Priscilla" as a Skrull was supposed to be romantic, but it looked ridiculous. I Get What They Were Going For. But they should have seen it didn't play, and gone for a different moment.

No tag? Unusual, but I don't actually object. I'm tired of the tags.

Not great. But it's not like I expected it to be. The show's underwhelmingness has been consistent from the start. I am (sort of) pleased to report that it didn't actually disappoint me there. 2 1/2 stars.