Dune: Part Two

I am going to ask a serious question and I want you to be straight with me: Is there something wrong with me? Is the fact that it seems like I can never reach consensus with other board members and fans because I am pathological? I ask because this movie has gotten raves, and while it IS well-made, and an epic spectacle, I also think it sucks donkey nuts. EVERYBODY loves Dune, but it sucks donkey nuts.

Around the first half of the film, I was feeling pretty defensive over my negative feelings. My feeling was the tone of the review was gonna be "I didn't understand this much, because I didn't read the books, and I'm sure once I do, this will hit me better." That was essentially my review for the last film. After seeing this one, I'm not gonna waste my time on the books. Regardless of how well-loved they are, they are not my kind of sci-fi or fantasy.

Going through the galaxy in the United Federation of Planets, or the worlds of the Star Wars Universe, or Hogwarts, or Middle-Earth, all these genre continuities have in common is I enjoy visiting them. I like imagining myself on quests and adventures with the characters. And even if the circumstances in the Universe are often dire (see Star Wars) I enjoy being there anyways.

Arrakis is essentially a PG-13 version of Westeros. A cesspool and a total pit with unlikable heroes and appalling scenarios. The "hero" of this movie essentially commits genocide by the end of it.

I think the things about the film that I responded to so negatively were some of the little touches. Like water being so scarce the characters had to harvest it from dead bodies whenever possible. No. Uh uh. This is NOT the Universe for me. And I fucking abhor the fact that this barbarism is being portrayed as common sense and as "There but for the grace of God go we all." No. I refuse to normalize that shit or pretend there is a scenario out there were that IS acceptable. Games Of Thrones was very quick to normalize all kinds of horrible behaviors. I caught on to that trainwreck pretty quickly, and I'm not taking it from Dune. I know better.

And prophecies and predestination bullshit? It's NOT my jam. It never was.

I am a known internet buzzkill. I'm not saying I'm a troll, or that my opinions aren't sincere. But I value difference things than most of the rest of you. But if you are frustrated with me for giving this well-received movie a bad review and are like "Matt Zimmer is why can't have nice things," I'll push back against that. At least for this movie. I dispute that nearly three hours of pure unpleasantness is a nice thing. If you think it was, you get to get your definition of "nice" recalibrated.

Speaking of that PG-13 rating,, the fact that it wasn't given a hard R for what was shown here, shows the MPAA is unfathomably corrupt, and one step above (or maybe below) a criminal organization. Money changed hands about this. I'm sure of it.

Come and get me for thinking this sucks. Call me a contrarian who only posts shit like this to annoy people. This is a deeply unpleasant film. And it stirring a negative reaction in me is something I think is quite understandable. If you don't, well we'll probably never agree on much. 2 1/2 stars.