Minions

Damn it, the stupid tag was a dance party. I would have given the movie 4 and a half stars if it hadn't been. I'll just pretend I shut it off at the credits.

But no, I can't, because Mellow Yellow is the perfect song for the Minions. When it gets to the part about the electric banana, I was like, "That is either the most perfect coincidence ever, or the characters were actually based on that song." It strikes me far likelier it is a wonderful coincidence instead.

I liked the movie better than the first two Despicable Me movies because Kevin, Stuart, and Bob are easier characters to root for than Gru is.

Was there a specific reason Sandra Bullock voiced Scarlet? She doesn't have a great voice for animation, and she's not the kind of marquee stars these movies annoyingly glom onto. I think they would have done better to either cast a lady with a great, distinctive voice, or another forgettable actress who was more relevant in 2015 than Bullock was.

The Minions confuse and confound me a bit. They are so kind and wonderful, that it really makes no sense that they seek out and are drawn to evil. That's part of the joke I guess, but as far as jokes go, it makes zero sense. I mean Bob and his teddy bear just stole the movie because they were adorable.

And it's not enough that Kevin survived. He saved the Teddy too. Aww!

It annoys me how far back in the credits Pierre Coffin is. His role is much bigger than Sandra Bullock's, and he has to be listed behind Steve Freaking Coogan in his own damn movie.

I love the Minions singing the Universal Studios Theme at the beginning. Although they ripped that bit off from Ralph Wiggum at the beginning of The Simpsons Movie.

The movie reminded me how big a presence Queen Elizabeth had been in our lives and for how long. It was kind of cool seeing it in 2022 for that reason. Her scenes in the movie make me smile now more than they would have before she passed.

I would have given that a near-rave if not for the tag. I'll recommend it anyways, but that specific thing that pissed me off should never have happened. The movie was weaker in hindsight for it. 4 stars.

Deleted Scene: Me, Myself, And Stuart:

I have no idea why this was deleted. It's not exactly funny, but it's been fully animated already, and it only 30 seconds long. It may just be additional goofing off, but it's so short it's hardly padding. I don't see the logic of removing it after the scene's expensive animation was already done. 3 1/2 stars.

Mini Movies

I wasn't too thrilled with these cartoons. Overall: 2 1/2 stars.

Cro Minion

As I was watching this the only thing I could think of was wondering why the Caveman Minions are wearing goggles. Yes, wooden goggles, but it still makes no sense.

Did I mention the cartoon sucked? The ending was beyond unpleasant. 1 1/2 stars.

Competition

Kind of cute. 3 stars.

Binky Nelson Unpacified

Well, at least the museum guard wasn't killed after all.

I like the Nelsons, but their story takes place in 1968. The short using a laser alarm system for the museum is a no-no for that reason.

And I found the domino Rube Goldberg stuff of the exhibits falling over beyond lazy writing. 2 1/2 stars.

International Trailer

Pierre Coffin isn't even given a voice credit in the trailer. It bothered me in the movie how low his credit was at the beginning, but at least it existed. He's the star of the movie and the trailer is hyping Sandra Bullock as if the little kids flocking to this want to see her instead of Bob and his teddy bear.

Also the movie is not set 42 Years B.G. (Before Gru). It's set more like a week or two before him. 3 stars.