Ted (Peacock Series)

That was wonderful. The ending wasn't great, but that's probably because the episode ran a little long. It was very strong otherwise.

This is why I don't watch trailers. I didn't see the trailer for this but I did read reactions and they were universally negative. I admit I'm a prickly grump myself. But if I'm gonna be that, then the project is gonna earn it honestly, by me seeing everything in context instead of me making up my mind beforehand. I have no idea if the trailer was that bad or not. But the show is great. When Seth MacFarlane takes a firm hand writing and directing a show, good things tend to happen.

Here is why Ted is a great, irrepressible character. Instead of apologizing for using the word "midget", he reasons it applies to himself and takes ownership of it. I especially love that later during the dinner he claims Blaire's thing with the black Barbie was a hundred times more damning. It really wasn't, but Ted is an irrepressible bastard because it sounds like it could be. Ted is very good at winning b.s., untrue arguments to justify his own poor behavior.

I personally don't think Sheila is a bad name, but I like the idea that sometimes really hot people are given bad names to level the playing field.

Mike Henry is cast as the bank teller in a truly unfunny and embarrassing scene. You could accuse the show of cronyism, and MacFarlane doing favors for his friends, but after that scene I'm wondering if they're actually friends. This role seems more like something you'd give somebody you didn't like as a punishment.

How could they not contract Patrick Stewart? Dude will do anything for money. At least the show understands the proper understudy is Ian McKellen, and he's the prequel's narrator. Whatever.

Because some of my reviews are posted on family friendly boards I can't detail the brilliance of the Full House threat Ted makes to John to get him to talk to Sheila. But the threat is so bad because of the specificity of it. It makes it sound utterly believable. Which is why John backs down and does exactly what Ted says.

For the record, I realize this is set in 1993, but I live in Framingham, MA, and as of 2024, this is hardly a gentrified town. Maybe it was back then, but it is nowhere near as white bread of a suburb as the show and the school setting is making it out to be. I would guess about half of the people in my apartment building don't speak English as a first language and I think that's kind of cool.

227 was fine, but I question its relevance in 1993. The timing of the joke is off. Full House was still a thing in 1993 (and Lori Loughlin is actually only in the later episodes) but 227 wasn't being rerun at that point in time in syndication. Pearl was great though.

The gun on the slip-and-slide is enough for me. I can safely say, no matter what else happens, or how good or bad the rest of the season and series are, it deserves to exist just for that scene.

Speaking of which, back in 1993 The Price Is Right aired at 11:00 in Massachusetts, not ten. Same as today. That fricking show has been in the same timeslot and network my entire damn life.

The thing I love about the character of Ted is how manipulative he is to justify his refusal to grow and change as a person. He's the same size he's always been. But his arrested development is entirely his own choice, and I love how fiercely he defends his right to it.

Even in 2024 that Challenger joke Ted makes at the end feels a little too soon.

I am on-board. Usually it takes more than one episode to turn me into a fan of something, but this already has me. 4 1/2 stars.

It is quite common for a good series, especially one with a great Pilot, to come out with an atrocious sophomore episode. Ted definitely fits that mode. This episode is the pits.

I should have sensed bad things by the Jerky Boys opening. I HATED the Jerky Boys. They were mean, not in the same way Family Guy is, but to real people. They felt especially cruel for that reason. And them being the model for the prank is just awful. What kills me is Ted and John are shocked Clive is crying. It would be weird if he wasn't.

The scene in the operating room is pretty much everybody's worst nightmare. I don't think Matty's Vietnam secret is as shockingly repulsive and unfunny as the "Donkey Show" from Clerks II. But it's it bad for the same reasons. It's nowhere NEAR as bad. But its matter of ballpark is between sex and foot massages (kids won't get that reference).

For the record, John Rubenstein actually HAS guest-starred on The Orville. MacFarlane clearly IS a fan.

That was pretty damn awful. 1 star.

I though Ted's "making conversation" with Blaire at the beginning was amazingly hilarious. And I'm starting to see where Bad Improv from Ted 2 came from. This has always been John's problem.

I guess the thing I don't like is how terrible Matty and Susan's marriage is. I mean, there are worse fictional marriages. But this one stings because Matty isn't abusive. He's just awful. And I feel so bad for Susan. And the scene with the banana made me cringe.

MacFarlane getting his money's worth with Ian McKellen. Very similar to Patrick Stewart in saying anything if you pay him enough money.

Also not a good episode but not as bad as the second. 2 stars.

It WANTS to be a good episode but it's a little much. Will is actually WAY too much and the professor in the teddy bear costume is too much too. Hucking ostrich eggs at trick-or-treaters on Halloween should be money-in-the-bank comedy. But the episode sort of went too far.

By the way, Disney COULD be scary in the 1980's.

Also, it never made ANY sense why McDonald's pies are so hot. Their burgers are always lukewarm. Why are their pies and coffee so insanely hot?

A little much. Take it down a notch, Seth. Although The Watcher In The Woods getting some love is a good thing. 3 stars.

I found the episode interesting. I think Susan and Matty have a terrible marriage. But the idea that Susan is happy with it is kind of cool because it sounds like a valid interpretation, especially after helping the bully girl in the hallway. And I like the person she got mad at was Blaire for not allowing her to be satisfied with the way things are.

And this is not a feminist moral, and it is on-brand that the episode was written by MacFarlane himself. But I like that it's presented as a controversy.

Reminder to self. Never piss Ted off. He stows grievances in the back of his mind like bombs, ready to go nuclear in terrible moments. It's a bit frightening how casually and easily cruel he is.

That principle played by Penny Johnson-Jerald is a badass. Ted promising to ask a question in the assembly sounds like the most heroic sacrifice possible.

I thought it was solid. 3 1/2 stars.

I thought it was great.

I have to admit I did not dig the political arguments. A lot of current rightwing media uses strawman arguments to argue against liberal ideals. Seth MacFarlane often uses strawman arguments to argue against conservative ideals. I guess the crap Dennis says is credible for 2024, and that's sort of why it plays. But it's 1993 on the show, and back then, people didn't say stuff that stupid out-loud because even they knew how stupid it sounded back then. People in 1993 possessed something missing from MANY people (politically) in 2024: Shame. For that reason Dennis is an interesting antagonist. He gives Matty permission to be even stupider and more hateful than he already is.

I think the episode and the show have value because it went from that to Matty apologizing to Blaire and Sarah, and the confrontation with Dennis. Dennis turning out to be gay felt a little too pat of a resolution, and part of me wonders what this actually says about Matty deep down instead. But while the political arguments themselves were too arch to be believable, I thought the human moments worked.

This is the first episode Ted and John are the supporting characters. Them going through the Bible and trying to guess Ted's "alignment" is both blasphemous and perfect. Also, do they need dice for this?

The reason people were skeptical about a Ted series is the premise wears thin. It already had by the second movie. I think the series is aware of that and stretching the premise a bit, which is for the best. I thought it was a very strong episode. 4 stars.

OJ Simpson ruins everything.

I love the episode ending on a title card saying the real killer is still out there. Riiiiight.

John talking about the banana was hysterical. How does this guy have ANY game?

It was a good finale to a season with its ups and downs. 3 1/2 stars.