Aquaman and the Lost Kingdom (2023)

I wanna talk about Arthur and Orm, and I figure that will be the longest part of the review because it's the part of the movie I liked best. Before we get there, some basic thoughts should be shared first.

I don't feel like the script was very strong. The recap at the beginning was probably necessary for people who only saw the first movie once. Like me, for example. I had forgotten most of that stuff. It doesn't stop it from feeling trite and poorly-written. Recaps tend to suck, and I never use them. Mamoa's dude-bro antics and the "Bad To The Bone" Soundtrack wear thin pretty quickly too.

Contrary to rumors, Amber Heard was NOT cut out of the movie. Heard's public problems with Johnny Depp really soured people on her but even if I were to accept the idea that she was a lying sociopath, it's not like Depp himself was gallant or well-behaved. Whatever else happened in that marriage, I believe physical abuse from him was part of it. And whether she inflicted psychological abuse or not (she probably did) it's weird THAT is the unforgivable thing society suddenly has the problem with, and insists she be blacklisted for it. Not my favorite actress, and although she is very beautiful, I won't miss seeing her onscreen the way I will Johnny Depp. I just feel like the movie felt the need to hide her role because she has such a bad reputation. And I don't think that was necessary.

I actually recognized Martin Short's voice. I would be very surprised if a ton of other people did when they first saw it.

I both appreciate and am annoyed that although this is the final Extended Universe film, Barry Allen doesn't appear in the tag to reboot the Universe. Not just because Ezra Miller is icky (in a way I don't believe Amber Heard is). But because the film isn't built for it. It's the luck of the draw it's the final Extended Universe film. It is certainly not good closure. I appreciated it for that.

I guess my problem with the lack of a visible reboot is in my mind it makes the fact that James Gunn is insisting on putting Peacemaker Season 2 and Waller in the new continuity super dumb and annoying. If I were him, I would have just canceled both projects instead of muddying the waters further. Or at least kept them both set in this Universe, maybe as a narrative Epilogue. And the lack of a reboot explanation HERE tells me those muddy waters will be completely unnecessary and annoying. I am not looking forward to either project.

Time to talk Arthur and Orm. I liked us learning that Orm was actually surprised Arthur never wanted the throne. What was cool about the way it was played is that Orm is shocked. But he also believes him and doesn't go on a self-serving rant calling him a liar out of spite. I am more ready for Orm's redemption at the end of the picture than I was before he chose to believe Arthur, not because he particularly likes or trusts him, but because his argument makes sense. There is some regret built into learning he could have stayed king if he hadn't gone nuts on his surface-world-dominating beliefs.

I thought the cockroach joke was stupid because Orm liked it, and Arthur never clued him into the punchline. Until they brought it back in the tag, he puts it on the cheeseburger, and he's finally as satisfied as Arthur claimed he would be. I was like "Ah!" That's not as long a pay-off for a joke as The Brick Joke. But it's awesome for the same reason.

Also, a restaurant has cockroaches on the tables, and is portrayed as nice and popular? For real? Even the GOOD stuff in the movie is super dumb. Yeah, yeah, outdoor restaurant, but still, roaches? Come on, now.

Orm looked pretty emaciated at the beginning, and then water hits him and he has pecs. I wonder which part of the transformation was CGI.

I guess I like seeing Dolph Lundgren in so-called respectable movies. The man probably deserved a more legitimate career than he got. He's probably the only major action star who is a member of Mensa. Most of those guys seem super dumb in real life, so I always root for Lundgren's success.

I didn't realize Arthur's dad was Boba Fett. The Book Of Boba Fett came out after the first movie so no wonder I didn't make the connection. Yeah, I know he was in the Star Wars prequels but he was not exactly a household name, or recognizable before his stint on Book and The Mandalorian.

I am not going to miss the continuity, but this DOES feel like a bit of an arbitrary and random stopping point. I really wish Peacemaker had been canceled and the new continuity was given a fair chance to start fresh. Aquaman leaving no real loose ends gave Gunn an opportunity I'm a little miffed he's not going to take advantage of. A new continuity only needs to be overly complicated and overexplained if Gunn chooses it to be. Gunn bringing back Peacemaker is why we aren't allowed nice things. 3 1/2 stars.